Over a year has passed since the release of The Limerent Mind, a book I have since updated and lengthened...
Most people consider romance a highly important facet of life. For individuals prone to limerence, however, it overshadows everything and...
Limerence is a mind-bending condition that unleashes an array of obsessional emotions, motivations and behaviours in you. Of course, first and foremost, it drives you to analyse every last thing about your LO. You’ll find yourself incredibly interested in your LO’s life, personal relationships, pastimes, vices, and innermost thoughts.
You’ll catch yourself hanging onto their every last word, dissecting everything they say as if they’re imparting the most valuable information in the world.
But, this isn’t ‘innocent curiosity’ – it’s a destructive symptom of limerence, and is incidental to your desire for complete enmeshment with your LO. It’s keeping you trapped.
Here’s how to deal with (and rise above) your ‘fascination’ with your LO, and their personality quirks and life.
Recovering from limerence is, at points, painful. But, I’m going to teach you a trick that will help you feel better, whenever you feel like you are slipping into a depressive, delusional state.
Essentially, it’s a highly reliable way to change focus and step sideways out of your slump. This is the ONLY way to make heightened limerent longing shrink – trying to fight and wriggle out of the pain simply does not work.
You must, instead, pick up momentum and take a decisive ‘jump’ towards the new – towards new emotional experiences. Here’s how to do just that.
In this post, I would like to bring your attention to a sneaky, insidious collateral effect of limerence that is easily overlooked but highly damaging. I believe you may be surprise upon finding out what it is, as it is not something that is typically highlighted or even acknowledged.
What is it?
The tendency to conclude things about your own character while you are limerent, based on how your LO is treating you.
I’m looking to add an exciting new chapter to my book The Limerent Mind, featuring stories from limerents. If you’d...
Some of us are far more obsessional and prone to rumination than others. In itself, this is not inherently ‘pathological’ or an issue; having an affinity for honing in on certain topics comes with many splendid advantages, enabling you to both a). pull off highly impressive personal and professional achievements and b). live life with a certain emotional richness that someone lacking your ‘intensity’ simply never will.
Limerence has a subtle, insidious way of entrapping you which extends beyond its impact on your mental health. In short, it is the fact that limerence feels so sentimentally meaningful that it can seem implausible, unfair and downright impossible to believe that it is something that you actually have to ‘get over’. In order to extirpate these doubts of yours, I am going to present you with a completely novel way of viewing limerence: as one of many *emergent phenomena* that your brain creates on a daily basis.
The foolproof way to alter the beliefs and assumptions you subscribe to is to communicate with your subconscious mind when it is most receptive. Right before you fall asleep, you are certain to catch your prime window of Alpha brain wave activity (8-12 Hz). In this state of relaxed wakefulness, your brain is extremely impressionable. Anything that you feel to be real during this time is taken by your brain as objective reality. This will induce the formation of new neural pathways and, consequentially, new stances towards yourself, others, romance and life.
I know that every single one of you will have had very different experiences with LOs. However, one thing that every single limerent has in common is the following: they believe that their LO is, in some marked way, more powerful than them.
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